Run Again

I have been working on building mental and physical energy to get the running on track again... today, I actually got out on a run. My legs aren't quite up to the task yet. Hopefully a few short runs, and some decent stretching will help get things worked out.

Last year I used my running to help bring my life out of the darkness and haze of grief I was held up in. I can now look back and see that time as my Road of Ashes. This reference comes from a book called Iron John by Robert Bly, a book I have been reading for a while now (I'm kind of slow). As I read this book it seems like I am now entering a time where I may need to use my running to help develop my "warrior" self. The part of me that can carve out the environment for my soul to take the next step in the journey. The "warrior" that I speak of is not the warrior we know today (armies, terrorist, etc.) this is the mythical warrior, a state of being that is only one part of a person's (Iron John speaks directly to men) path to a fully developed self.

How will running help me in this matter... well, running was the last time I had a "warrior" self. A time when I was highly focused, committed, and disciplined, the last time in my life where I fiercely defended myself to achieve my goals. So, it is my hope that I can use the small steps of getting my running back in gear... as a teaching tool, and road map to getting my deeper self back in gear. We'll see how it goes. I'll keep you posted...

Today: 2ish miles
Week: the same

Life. Stuff. Spring.

Ok... this has been a really lousy blog as of late... my apologies if you have been checking in. However, if you have... then won't this be a great surprise ;-) I had all intentions of getting a run in today, but it doesn't seem to be working out. I did get a few miles of walking in this morning and that might have to count for today. Tomorrow it WILL happen though!!! Spring has arrived (even in Iowa, or so I hear), and I need to add the running component back into the mix of my life. Life in 2007 has been pretty crazy so far... I can feel energy awakening this Spring that I haven't had access too in a long time. That is exciting. Now the trick will be to harness that energy in an efficient way. At the moment it is shooting in every direction at once. I think the running will help with this. When you get into a routine with running, it adds some order to your life... no matter how chaotic. It always helps focus me, and I need to pick up that tool once again. I had hoped to be doing a marathon this Spring... obviously that is not in the works, but as I look to this next year... that is the goal. Where as last year I was beginning to have the energy to make the claim... I can now feel the energy building to back it up. So, as with so many things in life... the cycle begins once again. Runners take your mark...

This was supposed to be a quick "hey, I am really going to run tomorrow post"... and then I was going to send you to a great blog post from a new Flickr friend of mine. *warning* if you don't want to see a picture of me rockin out in my undies... do not follow the link to Hilary's Blog.

A RUN... sorta

It was over 50 degrees here in Spencer today... so, you bet I was going to get out the door for a run. Unfortunately my body was not on the same page. I tried to get the legs going... and they just weren't going to do it. My knee felt like a rusty old hinge, beat up and frozen up. I did at least get out there and get things movin, so maybe my next attempt will go a little better. It was a long past few days... also part of the problem. I was working long hours (meaning standing on the concrete) and the legs just were not up to the task today. However, it was so beautiful out that I didn't really care... so I just enjoyed the "near Spring" day. Hopefully the running part will happen next time.

today: 1 mile or so
Week: 1 mile

RAGBRAI

Ok sports fans... we are going to get a Shaky Tree RAGBRAI team together. RAGBRAI is a bike ride across Iowa. Well, it is sort of a big party on wheels from what I understand. We had the idea of getting a team together, and now that the route is going right through Spencer... we are REALLY excited to do it. I have made a team... so if you are interested in joining in the fun, go through the sign up process on the website, it is team "Shaky Tree" (group #30698). We have to get chosen in a lottery (I am still trying to figure out how this all works...) but I think being on a team gives a better chance. We will be getting a vehicle (maybe a few) to keep gear and such, as well as hopefully selling coffee along the way. I am posting this here first to get as many friends outside of Iowa as I get going on this... should be fun!!! If you are interested, we have to get this set up soon!!!

Details:
RAGBRAI- week long bike ride across Iowa, fun times!!!
When: July 22-28
E-mail me for more info if you are interested.

42

42
Originally uploaded by TreeBed.

Stop the presses... I actually got a run in today!!! It wasn't much of a run, but it was something. If you notice the forecast below, there is not a whole lot of chance of it being repeated anytime soon (who knows). However, I needed to get out and at least get the blood flowing, the mental boost... as well as a bit of stretching (probably the most useful part of the whole thing). The winter "blahs" have been wearing on me a bit (especially since I am actually experiencing a winter)... running is one of things I am allowing myself to put on the shelf (can't really put a new business on the shelf), but that sort of works against me since it is one of the things that keeps the "blahs" at bay. I did feel good about getting something in though, and it gives me a little momentum to start doing some indoor work (stretching, and some other exercises). I want to be ready to get a routine going once the weather is a little better (hey, I will take 20s), and Shaky Tree doesn't demand as much energy.

Anyway, if you are wondering why this post is called 42, I am doing this challenge on Flickr to take a picture of myself 365 days in a row. That is where most of my "blogging" energy has been going since Jan 1st... if you have been checking in on Go Elvis! I appreciate it, I will be getting it going again soon. Shaky Tree is going to have a RAGBRAI team... everyone is welcome to join us. There will be more info soon.

Today: 2-3 miles (no watch, and wasn't really paying attention)
Week: 2+

Heat Wave...

Heat Wave
Originally uploaded by TreeBed.

Could this mean... a run?

Shaky Tree Crew

Shaky Tree Crew
Originally uploaded by TreeBed.

Yes... I have been rather bad about posting... mostly cause NO running is getting done... I was so busy with the Barista competition, and now I am sort of dragging along in recovery mode. I was not able to pull off one of those spectacular "out of no where" victories, but I was able to learn a lot and have fun doing it. It was hard to not be on top of my game while in the spot light... however, I knew that was simply my ego, and when I looked at the bigger picture... it was a victory just putting myself out there. I knew that I couldn't forever live my life "trying not to screw up", but I had got my self so ingrained in that way of thinking... I really had to force my self to get out there. I knew I would learn a ton by taking my lumps, but it was like my whole body didn't trust that knowledge. I hope this experience helped further open the door to living a more open life. A life where fear is simply another input, not a controlling factor. You can go over to the Shaky Tree blog and find out a bit more about the competition.

Training

Well, I have been training... but haven't got a run in for some time. I have been coffee training... Next week I will be competing in the Midwest Regional Barista Competition in Kansas City. It has been awhile since I have been in this position. I mean I have done a couple of organized runs (not really races) in the past year, but nothing like a real competition. Nothing where I put myself out there. I always said that if I jumped in one of these Barista competitions, that I would do so when I was ready to win... being that I have really only had about 3 weeks to prepare for this... my expectations are a little different. However, I will still go into it wanting to win.

When I decided I was going to do this competition (right before leaving the midwest for the holiday), I had this rush of excitement... like I used to when I would dream about a conference meet or something. It was strange how almost foreign that feeling had become (as is the nervous butterflies in my stomach now ;-) The past 4 years or so I became so closed off that there was no room for that type of emotion. I wasn't able to really care about anything all that much. Not to say that winning a Barista competition is of the utmost importance now, but I am willing to say I want to win... and it will be a very public statement. Micah is Alive ;-) It will draw a good bit of attention to Shaky Tree, and really be the kick off to a year of putting myself out there. This is both exciting... and terrifying. There is still the part of me that has been buried for years that is sensitive to being "out there", and wants very badly to go right back into the cave. Each day it seems I can feel more and more input coming in... some I recognize, some I have no idea what to do with. The grey area between wading through deep grief, and being a functional liver (and lover) of life is a bit more pronounced than I anticipated. I guess I always thought there would be grief and sadness, and then bam... something else. I feel like this competition is a big step towards the tipping point. That is an exciting prospect. One of the next steps will be that darn marathon I have been talking about. One step at a time... with lots of breathing in between.

Happy New Year!!!

Being the first day of the new year I figured I better start things off with a run... oh, and I haven't run for... well, a long time. I had these grand plans of getting plenty of sunny CA runs in while home... not so much. Soon it will be off to the frozen midwest (which I am sure will motivate me to run), and we'll see what happens on the training front.

Anyway, I hope everyone had a fun (and safe) NYE... and has a beautiful start to the new year.

Today: 3 miles
Week: 3 miles

Present

Well, this is my second attempt at this post... I wrote quite the eloquent description of my run this morning... and then it disappeared into computer nothingness. I am now at work, and not sure I am up to recreating such a stroke of literary genius (ok, maybe not, but I sure thought it captured my run). I guess the main point of what I wrote was that I was fortunate enough to be present to my run this morning, and really enjoy it. To pay attention to all the details of how I was feeling, and how that fit into the larger context of my life. I passed an older man walking his dog and he said, "great day for a run." I blurted out, "its beautiful!" I am sure he must of had some runs under his belt to recognize the beauty of this cool cloudy day as prime running weather... that lead me to thinking about all my wonderful running connections, and all the amazing people that I have run with over the years. Mostly I was thankful today to have a life that allows me to take such pleasure in something as simple as a run.

Today: 4 miles
Week: 7 miles

Whats This?

Two days of running in a row... and three runs in a weeks time? Wow. You bet I am going to take advantage of the warm (well, warmer) weather, and get my butt out there. Today I drove to the park and got 3 miles of grass running in... doesn't get much better (maybe my NW trees and dirt) than running on a nice wide grass trail through the woods. I am happy to report that I have swung out of my blahs, running is still some of the most potent medicine for me. I am hoping that I can keep getting a few runs in over the next week or so... until I get back to the more friendly (yes, I am wuss now ;-) winter running weather of CA. I was starting to feel the lack of fitness, and the build up of stress (no matter how well things are going, starting a business is a little stressful) kicking my butt. I would like to exceed the build up of miles that I had at this time last year and go into the spring actually in shape (sorta, kinda shape at least). Still have a marathon on my mind for sometime next year.

Today: 3 miles
Week: 3 miles

Heat Wave!!!

54 degrees at the moment... awww yes, I have been in Iowa too long when I am excited about a high that is probably equal to the low in CA. Oh well, I will take it. I had a very enjoyable run in T-shirt and gloves this morning. Even though these runs are anything but routine... it still feels very good to get out and get them in. There is also something extraordinary about getting these beautiful days after a cold snap. I must admit that Vallejo weather is nice more often than not (by a long ways), and I begin to sort of count on it. But to get out and enjoy an exception to the December Midwest norm... is a special thing.

Today: 4 miles
Week: 7 miles

Blah

I finally got my first cold (27 degrees) weather run in. As usual my first run in a while so my knee was bugging me half way in and it had to be a run/walk sort of thing. The main thing is that I got out and did it. I needed to. I am hoping to counter act a little slide into the blahs. It is supposed to go colder again so I am not sure if I will be able to get back out for a bit... I am getting old and wimpy. All those days I didn't run during my California winters... I guess it is good to see the other side.

Today: 3ish miles
Week: 3ish miles

12

All I got to say is... 12 degrees... and it is getting colder!!!

Turkey Day Take Two

Pre-Turkey Run,
originally uploaded by TreeBed.

It is hard to believe that a year has gone by since I started this blog, and that I was beginning my journey to get the running shoes going again. A lot has gone on in that year. We missed Beetle on our run this morning. And a beautiful morning it was. After the run it was a soak in the hot tub. This is the life!!! Even with the break in my runs the past few weeks I felt pretty good today. I am thinking back to sucking wind last year on our Turkey Day jount. So even though my running hasn't exactly been the priority as of late... it is good to know that my fitness level is better off than a year ago.

Hope you all have much to be Thankful for... I know I do.

Today: 3 miles
Week: 5 miles

Ran.

Well, kind of... it wasn't much of a run. My knee was talking within a mile... so, it only ended up being a couple. However, enough to get me stretched out a bit, and hopefully ready to get a couple of runs in this week up in Oregon. It has been awhile since my last run, and even longer since doing so back in V-town. The run also took on some significance because it was a year ago that I started this Blog. What a year. I am not so sure that I made much of a Come Back (in my running anyway), but when I look at where my life was a year ago... then I can see a "come back" indeed. I have too much to do today to elaborate on that... However, I am hoping that this week brings some time to reflect on the journey of the past year.

Today: 2 miles (sore knee)
Week: 2 miles

Run?

Run... what is that? It seems like it has been forever since I was on a run. I am feeling better, and I am hoping that that the next few days will allow time for a run. Although we seem to be in the time period of using EVERY second of the day ;-)

I have heard rumor of 60 degree weather on the way... ooooh, heat wave. We'll see... that could be the extra push I need.

Halloween!

Happy Halloween... just wanted to send a spooky greeting to all... I am dressing as a tired entrepreneur. I have been fighting off a cold, or perhaps just stress/exhaustion... so no running for the past week. And it is in the teens tonight for our temp (low teens mind you), so that kind of weather is not helping. However, when I feel better... I am kind of looking forward to a freezing cold run (yes, I am sick well beyond the common cold). I have to admit a certain craving for it. I had some good midwest memories of freezing cold running. Not to often ice forms in the armpits of your shirt in California. One of those runs will probably do me just fine ;-)

Have a good one...

P.S. Beetle has his website up (mostly)... go check out what Southern Sole is up to.

Nap

Well, I was oh so close to getting a run in today... instead I took a nap. Yeah, not the same. I am craving a run, but feel pretty crappy so it has been hard to get out the door. I have run myself in to the ground a bit the past week or so, and now my body is fighting back. So, it is time to step back and make sure that I am taking care of myself (not always a strong suit of mine). The bright side is that the coffee house is starting to shape up... you can check out progress with the new link on the right side of the this page... TreeBed Projects. There you will find the start of another blog about my newest project (with links to pictures and such). Eventually we'll have a real website for the coffee house, but for now we'll just use the blog. The next few weeks will be pretty intense, hopefully it will generate some good stuff to talk about. However, it will be good ole Go Elvis! that reminds me to take time to get my running in (or some form of taking care of myself)... which I will do right now, and go to bed.

Post number 200!!!

Wow, 200 posts and about a month away from a year on this blog. It is hard to believe. In the next month I look forward to back tracking a little bit... reading over some of the early posts, and soaking it in. It was around this time last year that the damn started to show signs of stress. There were already small leaks, and the pressure of the pain and grief was beginning to punch holes in my wall. I can look back and see that now, but at the time I really had no idea how damaged I was. Well, perhaps I did, but chose to deal with it in poor ways... such as sticking fingers in holes... rather than punching more holes for the pressure to ease. That is what running did for me over the past 200 posts, but it was also the action of writing about it. That allowed much of that pressure to be released in a healthy way. Knowing that there was a handful of people on the other side that cared enough about that process to check in and read it every once in awhile... means more than you will ever know.

I now can see that I am in the process of taking down the damn all together. Time to let my life flow in a natural way... no longer damned up by grief and fear. Sometimes I wish to just blow it up and let the flood wash everything new, but I think there is also something to be said for taking it apart piece by piece. Allowing my life to adjust with the process, and perhaps understanding why the damn was built in the first place. I know that I am not the last person that is going to go through troubled times of grief... I want to be able to recognize when someone is at that bursting point. And then have the strength and understanding to support them as they let the waters break through the walls they have built. We all have those walls. Grief comes in many forms and from many areas of our life. Just watch the evening news... you can't help but absorb some grief of the world. That gets carried around. Being rejected by a loved one or loss in any form can cause grief, and that grief in itself is not evil. However, our society at the moment does a very poor job of giving people the tools to work through that grief. Thus, we have a world walking in grief. For those of you reading this... please know that I am committing myself to walk with that world, and give support in what ever way is called upon of my talents and skills.

Thank you for walking with me.

Today: 0 miles (so far)
Week: 10 miles (got 4 in yesterday)